the sunday lit

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     I am always interested in books that feature any sort of female perspective. She may be a main character - as is usually the case - telling a story of a female experience, or it can be something like this, essay type stories of real women who have shaped and mostly improved the world we live in. I am in constant awe of these courageous people who stood up to tyranny and the pyramid hierarchy of the patriarchy to change something, to have their voice heard. I wish I had that kind of drive and tenacity, or that kind of conviction in my own purpose.

    Now, this is a personal selection by the author (with some anecdotes about either her meeting them or some tidbits of her own life - like naming her dogs after Frida and Madonna), so it is not a comprehensive gathering, but she did feature women from around the globe. Of course, the reader may feel some are less deserving of being represented here than others (political figures very much included as they are usually the most polarizing). In any case, I found it a nice way to hear about women I never knew existed - either because they lived before my time or because they weren't a part of the mainstream conversations - and to also deepen my knowledge of contemporary figures, such as Rodham Clinton, Atwood or Merkel, of whom I had varying degrees of cursory knowledge.

    The women featured are not all good people. I found that very refreshing. It's not a compendium of well-mannered, well-behaved moral compasses,  but stories of women who got a piece of the power pie for themselves in any way they could. Some killed and schemed to get their positions, some inherited them from their late fathers or husbands, others yet worked damned hard to be heard; there are women here who did terrible things, who lifted up certain groups only to crush others into the ground, and also women who fought for others of their sex and tried to get them out from under the thumb of the male-centered society we live in. What they have in common is the change they brought and the influence that is still felt, the inspiration they gave to other women that - yes, it can be done. Another thing many of them have in common - and this crushed my heart - is the experience of sexual violence as a way for a man to assert his power over the "lesser sex". 

    Here we have women from almost all of the continents and of all skin complexions. There are authors - Margaret Atwood, Toni Morrison; a journalist - Anna Politkovskaya; artists - Artemisia Gentileschi, Clara Schuman, Frida Khalo; a singer - Madonna; an athlete - Cathy Freeman; a designer - Coco Chanel; a scientist - Marie Curie; a warrior - Joan of Arc; an environmentalist - Wangari Maathai; and then, of course, the women in the political sphere - Pharaoh Hatshepsut, Isabella of Castile, Catherine the Great, Dowager Empress Cixi, Golda Meir, Sirimavo Bandaranaike,  Hillary Rodham Clinton, Benazir Bhutto, Angela Merkel. It is really interesting to see the influence they had on their corner of the planet, but also the whole world.

    As I said, not all of these women are flawless pillars of morality and righteousness. And that's ok - because it's impossible to be perfect, to not stir trouble and still bring about change. All of them were denigrated and their life choices were questioned - especially them having a career and not simply marrying and being content with homemaking. They were held to much higher standards than their male counterparts and attacked for every choice they made - the more public figures most notably for such banal things as their looks or fashion sense. And still they did it. And, no matter your personal opinions on any of these women, they still managed to make something of themselves and secure a legacy in societies where they were only ever expected to be obedient and quiet daughters, wives, mothers - to not think or talk out of turn, to marry (someone who was chosen for them), be subservient to their husbands and birth and raise children, then die quietly. In essence, to live a life of quiet and unappreciated service and then drop dead when they were no longer seen as useful. They were not supposed to have opinions and share those opinions, to demand change -  and yet they did and they rose to prominence for it. I salute them.
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"She did not tell him that while coal and diamonds are both carbon, coal is too impure to be able, under whatever pressure, to become a diamond. According to science, you start off as a coal and you end up as a coal. Maybe that was the real life lesson."

    The story focuses on Nora Seed, a 35-year-old woman who is suffering from clinical depression which she manages with anti-depressants. Her life has not really turned out as she wanted - once a promising swimmer, she passed the opportunity to become an Olympian; writing and singing for her brother's band, she ruined their chances of being signed by a label by leaving; on the brink of marriage she decided to end a relationship; she declined the opportunity to travel to Australia with her best friend Izzy. Now, her parents are dead, she has no relationship with her brother, no romantic attachments and as of this morning - no job.

    All of this leads Nora down a dark path and she decided that it would be best if she ended her life. But just as she thinks it's all over she is transported to the Midnight Library, a special space between life and death crafter just for her. There time stands still and she sees Mrs Elm, her old school librarian who is to act as her guide on this adventure. Nora opens a pretty heave book of regrets and is given an option of undoing them. She chooses which option she wishes she would've taken and the kind librarian gives her a book that takes her into that other, parallel life.

    We see Nora as an Olympian, a famous musician, a wife to three different men... And yet there is something in each of these lives that disappoints her and lead her back to the library. Now, I really liked the concept until the end. The message here seems to be a mix between "just don't be depressed" and "live for the sake of other people". What? Why show Nora all the possibilities when she couldn't actually live any of them? And also spin it as if her giving up on life's opportunities is a good thing because somehow all of those choices she didn't make would have ended in disaster - her death, her brother's death, Izzy's death, her mother's death, etc. I thought it was established that she gave up on those things because of her depression and anxiety, not because she had some premonition they wouldn't end well. It's just much too preachier than I like my books. Somewhere along the way this turned from an entertaining what-if into a self-help book, and I do not like those. I felt like I was deceived by the author and the synopsis.

    Honestly, I am someone who is ambivalent to living - I don't think I'd ever have the courage to end it but I would be really happy to just drop dead. And if someone gave me this chance and showed me all my possible lives and then - when I found one I liked - said I actually couldn't have it... Well, let's say there would be no filling in that final book and coming back. And I'm just disillusioned, sad and lonely. Nora's problem is actual clinical depression, not just a lack of manifestation. She is still missing the same things in her life that she did in the beginning. It's not gonna be better just because she's looking at things differently. There were some self-care things I liked about the conclusion but the main idea kinda spoiled it for me.

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About Me



I blog from time to time about things that inspire me. Lately, I have been getting back into the habit of reading, and my posts reflect that. I'm also always trying to take pretty photos, with varying degrees of success.


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